Jim Mayotte: How to cope with life in the age of the coronavirus

To The Daily Sun,

In my 76 years, I have been through many crises. I have seen Polio, whooping cough, smallpox, measles, Ebola, swine flu, gas shortage and many others.

Here are some ways to cope:

Get drunk at home; you do not have to drive.

Cry now that Brady has left the Pats and Mookie is a Dodger. 

If you have children, love them and teach them.

Get out the old games, Monopoly, Life, Checkers, and Chess.

If you do not have a PC, buy one and install video conferencing, e.g., SKYPE.

If you are a collector, inventory and organize your collection.

Pray with your children.

If you are alone, ask the person you are seeing to marry you or move in with you.

There will be a baby boom, called “coronababies”. 

Have a romantic dinner by candlelight; support your local restaurants by ordering takeouts.

Read a 1,000-page novel; by the time you are done, it will be “back to work”.

Play golf, order takeout beer and delicious $2 hot dogs, and have fun.

If coping fails, get drunk at home; you do not have to drive.

Jim Mayotte

Sanbornton