In the wake of COVID, Gilford High School embraces connections

GILFORD — Peer-to-peer counseling, a support system begun at Gilford High in 2019 and in place at high schools statewide, is helping kids surmount personal hurdles  – especially in the social and emotional aftermath of COVID-19.

Jesse Powers, an 11^th grader who was trained in counseling and suicide prevention last year, said he enjoys helping fellow students in need, which he sees as an intrinsic part of giving back to his community.

“You check in once a week. Sometimes you play games and connect with the person that way,” said Powers, who plans to join the Marine Corps after high school. “They talk about what’s troubling them. I just listen.”

Post-COVID, the program fills a pressing niche. Since the pandemic, anxiety and depression have soared across all demographics, and school-age children have been significantly affected, according to current worldwide surveys of mental health.

“I was a freshman when COVID hit,” Powers said. “Schools are a safe place for some kids. After people being home alone, there’s a lot more interest in receiving peer support.”

Kelly Caravona, the student assistance counselor at Gilford High, said evidence backs the specific value of peers reaching out to peers – including during this uneasy transition back to normal, with virus variants ebbing and flowing but not closing school. 

“Young people are going to listen to other young people. It’s another outlet that maybe feels a bit more approachable – an organic connection with a peer. When youth lead this effort we have a larger impact than when it’s adults alone,” Caravona said.

Powers sometimes sits with struggling students in the cafeteria at lunchtime. “It’s just easier talking with someone your age,” he said. “Sometimes they want to speak their mind. Most of the time they tell me what’s going on at home. It’s nice just having someone listen. If you’re a single child at home, there’s no one to talk to. It’s beneficial to speak face to face. You can see the emotions. It’s on a deeper level,” Powers said.

At Gilford High, students who are trained as peer counselors help coach incoming volunteers. This month, five high school student counselors spend time with about six students, down from the eight who signed up for peer counseling in the fall.

“It’s matching someone with a friend,” said Caravona. “The immediate result is connection. That is what we see.”

Through the Connect program pioneered by NAMI-NH, the state’s chapter of the National Alliance on Mental Illness, Powers and other peer counselors learn about suicide risk factors, safe messaging, how to spot suicide warning signs, and how to hold “normalizing” conversations around mental health – dialogues that in the past were silenced by the stigma surrounding mental illness. But in schools and society at large, that perception is fading. Connect volunteers are armed with information on what’s available in schools and the community for help. Since it began in New Hampshire roughly 15 years ago, Connect has become a national model for youth suicide prevention, and its training is widely available for student volunteers in New Hampshire high schools.

It's not the only avenue for help for students.   

At Gilford High and elsewhere, counselors hold group sessions on coping strategies, how to navigate relationships and manage stress, and “how to put names to really big emotions (students are) having trouble verbalizing,” said Caravona. Emotions as frustration, anger, worry or fear can undermine learning and be personally overwhelming.

There are efforts to disconnect children from technology when it isn’t necessary for learning, and when in-person interaction can thrive and distance from online messaging can provide emotional detox. There’s a no-cell phone rule in the guidance office, so waiting students can take a break.

This year, the GHS counseling department added online resources on the school website that are available to any staff, student or community member. They include guided meditation and mindfulness training as well as guided physical exercise, and allow individuals to access self-help and support with privacy when they have time between activities, at home, at night, on weekends or even in the car. For many kids, it’s a user-friendly, less public alternative to walking through the counseling office door.

“For those who want to reach these resources, they can do it independently. They can do it at night or on a Saturday,” Caravona said.