Saturday Night Live‘s cold open for November 8 featured President Donald Trump launching into an unhinged monologue after the Oval Office fainting episode during a November 6 press conference.
For the sketch, the POTUS gathered in the White House’s Oval Office with pharmaceutical executives to discuss the lowering prices of GLP-1 medications.
Mikey Day as Eli Lilly CEO, David Ricks,introduced Andrew Dismukes as Robert F. Kennedy Jr. and Marcello Hernandez as Dr. Mehmet Oz. Suddenly, a man standing near them fainted, and RFK Jr. shouted, “Oh no!” before running away from the scene.
That’s when James Austin Johnson as Trump began his wild monologue while standing behind the Resolute Desk.
“Oh, hi. Didn’t see you there. Someone was dying in my office. I think I’m playing this very normal. Just stand there and stare like a sociopath. Didn’t even pretend like I was going to help, like when someone drops something and you do the fake bend.”
He added, “And how about RFK, huh? Booked it out of here like someone was trying to give him a vaccine. ‘Brain worm, take the wheel!’ That thing kind of Ratatouille’d him right out of the room.”
Additionally, Trump spoke about the Democratic Party’s sweeping wins in the midterm elections, pointing out, “But our side had some wins this week, too. Supreme Court said we could stop feeding poor people.”
Johnson as the POTUS continued, “And for those of you who can afford food, actually, no you can’t I promised grocery prices would plummet, and they did: They plummeted straight up. And people are now saying, ‘But sir, how will I afford my Thanksgiving turkey for my family? Well, the good news is your family is not coming because all the planes are gone. We call that problem solving problem. Killing two birds with another bird. Now you got a bunch of crazy birds.”
Trump added, “That’s kind of our thing. Can’t afford food? Have some cheap Ozempic. Now you’re not hungry and you get to take one weird, painful poop a week.”
To conclude his monologue, the president addressed the ongoing government shutdown, “all thanks to the Democrats and some Republicans and all Republicans and me.” He explained, “And while we’re at it, we’re looking into perhaps stealing Christmas. We’ll be doing Grinch. I like the Grinch; he’s a great guy. You know, our wives are friends. We play golf sometimes.”
When the man who fainted finally came to and seemed OK, Trump offered his MRI punch card, “One more, and the next one’s free!”
Saturday Night Live, Saturdays at 11:30 p.m. ET on NBC
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