Voices event grants Lakes Region youth chance to speak freely

LACONIA — For local young people, feelings of isolation, stress, frustration with online learning, and a clear lack of emotional support resources were all too common over the last two years. This was revealed during the first ever public Voices event at the CAKE Theatre on Saturday. Over a dozen students braved the blustery weather to share their experiences and thoughts on the last two years and the future. The event was the culmination of The Daily Sun’s Voices project, an initiative to give local youth a chance to speak about their experiences over the last two years, and to share their current concerns.

The Sun partnered with the Laconia Youth Alliance, Lakes Region Mental Health Center and Chaos & Kindness to host the event. Some children were brought by their parents, while others walked to the event by themselves.

2021 Miss New Hampshire Ashley Marsh and local business leader Jodie Gallant served as masters of ceremonies on the CAKE’s stage for the introduction and final group discussion of the event.

Gallant encouraged students to “Speak out, share and be brutally honest,” and emphasized the event was a truly safe space for them to do so.

“There’s such a value in being heard,” Gallant said during the introduction. “Know that your experiences are valuable for community change.”

After a brief light and music video show, Laconia Youth Alliance members broke the children up into private discussion groups based on age while The Sun interviewed parents in their own group. Lakes Region Mental Health Center stood by as emotional support for any attendee in need. Each group’s answers to the event’s primary discussion were recorded, and are currently being processed into data that the community can utilize to better serve its youth population.

After the small group talks, attendees were offered free pizza and drinks, as well as a space to socialize. After the meal, all three groups met in the main theater of The CAKE, while parents sat in the balcony for a final large group discussion.

Student attendees overwhelmingly agreed that socializing online was not an adequate replacement for in-person social interactions.

When asked if the pandemic made them feel behind academically or socially, the crowd responded affirmatively. When asked if remote learning worked well for them, the crowd said "no."

“People struggled with it a lot,” specified one middle school student. “It’s hard to get your grades up after you haven’t really learned about things.”

“It’s harder to work online,” the student continued, “you can get distracted easily and play games and not be focused on what you need to be focused on.”

“I just skipped my classes,” confessed another student. “I just slept in.”

The transition back to in-person classes was also a challenge according to attendees. As students were unable to see each other in person, their social lives became even more digital than normal. As a result, some of their digital encounters bled into the real world when in-person classes resumed.

“Once we came back to school, there was lots and lots of drama,” said one attendee, referring to the online behavior trickling back into in person discussions. “So many people would get into it outside of school and then bring it into school which caused lots of drama which isn’t really easy for everyone.”

In addition to the loss of social and academic schedules during quarantine, some students lost what they saw as a safe haven and group of adults they could talk to after school.

“I have found a couple of teachers I’ll talk about my home life with,” said an attendee. “I feel like it’s a lot easier to talk with someone you don’t live with all the time.”

“I don’t like being home. I don’t feel safe all the time so being home is not okay for me,” another student said. “My dad is really scary to me, so me and him don’t have a good relationship. He tries to help, but the way he helps is hard and very brutal.”

Multiple students stated that their own parents failed to provide the emotional support they said they needed during the pandemic.

“My parents said that I was just seeking attention when I was trying to talk to them about how I feel,” shared another student.

Other students were able to find solace in after school programs.

“I usually go to real initiative. It's an after-school club thing. I go there 'til five. They make me feel welcome and stuff. It’s like a second home.”

One idea that parents discussed in their session was creating an adult-free, drug-free community spot for teens of the Lakes Region to safely congregate after school. As of this writing, there currently is no free, public hangout spot where teens can go outside of school or paid institutions like the Boys and Girls Club.

Some students said that some of their peers utilize drugs or alcohol to cope with emotional challenges.

“Some people use them[substances] to just remove themselves because they can’t really talk about it, they try to forget it,” said one student.

Recycled Percussion band member Justin Spencer joined the discussion via pre-recorded video to empathize with and encourage attendees by sharing his background of growing up poor in Loudon with two alcoholic parents. Spencer encouraged attendees to not utilize substances as a coping mechanism, and cited music and creativity as a healthy outlet for dealing with stress. Spencer also told students, that “it’s okay to not be okay,” and that there was nothing wrong with children expressing themselves and asking for help.

“Only you can advocate for yourself at that level, and only you have the power to do that,” Gallant said.

After the students were done sharing their thoughts and experiences, members of Lakes Region Mental Health Center shared healthy coping mechanisms and mental health resources. Shortly after, the attendees headed back out into the snow to return home.

The Sun will write a follow up article based on the data collected during the private discussion groups, and what the community can do to better serve its youth population.